Monday, June 20, 2011

Mission: Impossible!

If you recall a few weeks back, I demonstrated through a few news article links, that our president is an idiot when he claimed our "borders are safe and secure".  Well, I wonder what he might call it if he stayed just a few hours longer.  Or, perhaps if he would have paid a visit... say... yesterday!

This article was in today's online headlines of my local news paper The Valley Morning Star.  http://www.valleymorningstar.com  


Just to give you perspective, this is my backyard, perhaps not literally of course, but within 10 minutes of driving time, if you were stuck behind a really old driver in a really crappy car that has their blinker flashing even though there is no where to turn unless they want to smack into the border wall or drive into the Rio Grande River. 

Safe and secure MY ASS, Mr. President!  I'm used to hearing gunshots  - I'm a hunter from the most northern parts of the USA, I tracked deer, caribou and black bear  - but rapid-fire shots I am not accustomed to, rapid-fire weapons, I do not like, unless I am playing a 007 video game in which case I would want the upper hand.  This is not a video game though - I can't "reset" and start over with 3 lives to gamble.  Apparently, the president sees it differently.  Apparently, he has all the cheat codes for "infinity for life", however he does not have that "infinity" clout when it comes to the presidency!

Luckily, none of our local coppers were injured, but it could have just as easily been the other way around.

So, as it states in my "comments" of the news article, I ask this of President Obama:

How long do you plan on continuing your outlandish claims of "safe borders" and "no spillover"?? How many gunshots will it take, BEFORE your next election, for you to rebuke your claims? How many cops, how many citizens will have to DIE before you recant your words and do your job??
 
Mr. President, stop thinking about retaining your job and start thinking about retaining safety and security of our border!

This is DaCanon blasting off!

Friday, June 10, 2011

Harley D. Update #2 "The Final Chapter of the Cone"

I got up early this morning to take Harley D. to the vet.  Today marks the day he has been waiting for - the day that I promised him would come - the day he can finally be freed from the dreaded CONE.  {Insert scary music here}.

It dawned on me, late yesterday... too late to call and ask the vet anyhow... that my cat may have to be dropped off and be put under for this procedure.  I mean, come on, I couldn't imagine Harley just sitting there quietly and perfectly still while some stranger f***s around with his ear - after all, if he could talk, he'd tell me that the last time that happened, he got the {cue scary music} CONE.  So, in light of my kitty epiphany,  it was suggested I get there early - DRAT!!  I really wanted to sleep in - ON A FRIDAY - that is such a rarity in my week, but alas, Harley is more important than a few extra Zzzz's so I set the alarm (DRAT!). 

As I was leaving the house, I mentioned that I would pick up breakfast on my way home.  I was craving Whataburger (local 24hr burger joint).  I drove to the vet, walked in and a young man asked me if I was "dropping off". 
I said, "Well, I'm not sure.  I'm here to get stitches taken out of my cat's ear and I'm not sure if anesthesia is needed so you tell me, am I dropping off?" 
The vet tech said that it's an "in and out" procedure, no anesthesia is needed.  Then he asked me if Harley was "aggressive". 
I chuckled and told him, "No, however he does have that stupid {cue scary music} CONE around his neck and he hates it so if you free him of it, he may not want to leave your side, EVER, but he's not "aggressive".

The vet tech then told me that it would only take a few minutes.  He took Harley in back, and, no kidding, three minutes later, here he comes with Harley again, done!  It took three times longer at the drive-thru of Whataburger getting breakfast - something's wrong with that. 

Before leaving for the vet, and picking up breakfast, the tech asked me if I had any questions.  I asked him if Harley had any ear swelling ("No.") and if he had to wear the {cue scary music} CONE any longer.  I could have sworn I heard Harley sigh in relief right after the vet tech said, "No." 
I then asked the vet, where "it" was, referring to the {cue the... Aww forget it, you get the picture!}  The tech said that "it" is in the there, and he motioned to Harley's carrier - the same carrier that Harley is now lying.  My first thought made me laugh out loud and I just couldn't stop from there.  Just then, the vet gave me a peculiar look.  I envisioned Harley attacking the shit out of that {cue the scary music} CONE as payback!  The thought stayed with me all the way out to the car, still laughing aloud, imagining Harley's screeches as he tears "it" to shreds.  I was flashing on the scene in the movie "Jurasic Park" when the "Velociraptors" are being fed in the bushes (at the beginning of the movie)... loud shrieks of terrifyingly angry hunger, leaves and bushes shaking violently as the dinosaurs devour their prey, yet the creatures are no where in "true" sight.  Harley is not a raptor of course but, in my mind, the {cue scary music}CONE was his prey!  I was even egging him on, "Come on, Harley, now's your chance - strike, strike!" 

Yeah, well, it was all in my head.  Harley just wanted to go home. 

Harley has the typical after-flaw of a surgery like this - the crinkled, droopy ear, but at least it is not causing him pain, that I am aware of anyway, I mean, he hasn't given any indication of discomfort other than when he was jailed up in that stupid {cue scary music} CONE that he hated so much.

I am sure he is pleased that he can finally groom himself, instead of having me do it for him.  FYI:  I used a fine-tooth comb, I didn't do it the traditional "kitty" way...I love him very much but... eww!! 
I am also sure he is pleased to FINALLY get that "itch" near his ear that has been driving him nuts for ten days.  I think he is pleased to not be sequestered in his room, away from his other kitty buds (I think he may have even missed Frankie, in his own twisted "I hate you  - stay the f*** away from me" kind of way).  But most of all, I think Harley is pleased to finally, (FINALLY!!!) be rid of that stupid (yep, you guessed it)... {cue scary music} CONE!

PS:  What ever happened to {cue the scary music}CONE?? 

Well, I'd tell ya but Harley has dirt on me regarding a little incident that happened while in Vegas back in the 90's, so all I can say is... 

"What happens in the carrier, stays in the carrier!"{Insert scary music here}.

This is DaCanon blasting off!

Friday, June 3, 2011

Harley Update... Got Cone?

Here's an update on Harley D.  First off, I'm happy to report that the surgery went well.  He had no complications and the ear looks good.  His ear was, of course, shaved and he had a shaved spot along his front right leg... there was a bandage wrapped around this part of his leg.  I figured that is where they had placed an IV.  Thinking the bandage was no longer needed, I took it off, after all, it looked pretty tightly wrapped around there.  BOY WAS IT EVER!!  It was so tight that his front paw was swollen t three times its size and he couldn't walk on it.  It was probably numb to him.  I kept a close on eye it - my plan was to take him back to the vet if there were no signs of this swelling going down by morning.  When morning finally arrived, the swelling hadn't gone down significantly, but Harley did seem to be able to walk without struggle (that is, as much as possible with a cone collar around his neck.  More on that in a minute).  Since he didn't seem bothered by the swelled leg / paw, I decided not to rush him back to vet over it, but instead give him one more day and, if the swelling had not gone down by then, off we would go back to the vet.  As it turned out, the swelling had gone down completely by the next morning and Harley had his normal bounce back in his step (again, as much bounce as he could muster with a cone around his neck) with full kitty attitude on high alert!

At the risk of dating myself... I have always loved Saturday Night Live's, "The Coneheads", starring  Dan Aykroyd (Beldar) Jane Curtain (Prymaa) and Laraine Newman (Connie).  
 All ya need to know about Coneheads, click here

What they lacked, however, was a conecat.  

Harley has to wear one of those cone collars for ten days.  There is an official name for them, I just can't remember what they're actually called.   I know that the other critters are teasing Harley about this collar when I'm not home but the cone is to keep Harley from ripping those stitches out.  It took some adjusting for him, and some coaching on my part, to get him use to eating and drinking with it, but he doesn't seem to have many difficulties now that its been a few days.  His first night home (with the cone) was hard for him though, and I did feel sorry for him.  He was still groggy from the anesthesia and all that he has been through, so when I saw him struggling to balance himself with this cone thing around his neck, my heart went out to him, especially when he couldn't gauge the extra clearance needed just to step into the litter box.   He kept getting the bottom of the collar caught on the box's ledge (poor thing, all he wanted to do was pee, LOL).  I took the collar off and let him do his business without the stress and struggle, all the while I held myself ready to engage him at the first hint he was going to scratch that ear.  He didn't even try.  With the collar still off, he attempted a few bites of  food and that went well enough, considering he also had a dental cleaning too.  After about 30 minutes of collar-free, scratch-free, dazed and confused moments, I was ready to put the collar back on him.  That's when he rediscovered his favorite water bowl.  He couldn't get enough of the water.  Harley has this cute thing he does every time he takes a drink.  He scratches (uncovers) his water dish.  He has to do this several times before he even attempts to take a sip.  Then, just when you think he's done because he lifts his head and starts to walk away, he circles his dish and starts all over again.  On this night, he did this for a good ten minutes, at least.  He then "re-covered" his water dish - LOL.

I spread a blanket upon the floor for him to lay and rest more comfortably.  He normally sleeps on the bed but with that cone - lol  that darn cone - the poor thing didn't have the drive needed to jump up there on his first night and I didn't want to just put him up there myself  cuz, well, "what comes up, must eventually come down", and if I'm sleeping and he wants down, yet he is wearing that cone, his aim may be slightly off when landing on the floor and... splat.  (I know, I know, I worry...but I can't help but to think of these things, he's may baby boy and he needs help).  He laid right down on the blanket - he was pooped - he had a long, hard day and was done!!  I rubbed his belly (something he normally does not let me EVER do without kicking and scratching the shit out of me) and he purred himself right into a deep sleep.

The next morning, he was still adjusting to the collar but figured out a few maneuvers.  I have two other cats in the house, one of which Harley does not get along with, AT ALL, (Frankie Cat) so I have been keeping Harley separated from him, both day and night.  Usually, during the day, all cats have free range of the house, even though they choose to stay upstairs most of the time (cuz the dogs are downstairs) except the little orange kitty-man, "H. Davidson" -  he's the daredevil of the three.  So until Harley is out of his cone, I prefer to keep him separated from Frankie, for I am sure Frankie will take advantage of Harley's vulnerability and that ear could get torn open.  

Because I also have three large dogs in the house, one of them who thinks all cats should be her personal chew toys, I need to keep all of our cats closed in their bedrooms at night when we are sleeping, or we, the people, would never get any rest.  The sleeping arrangements are simple enough, all dogs in the master bedroom with the masters (hence the name, MASTER bedroom (arf!!)).  Since Harley practically raised Davidson from kitten-hood, Harley D. and H. Davidson sleep in one bedroom, and then that leaves Frankie Cat, (the one Harley fights with), he sleeps in the other spare bedroom.  The cats get along well enough with the dogs, except for Bailey, our newest rescue.  She was a one year old stray chocolate lab pup that found us not too long ago.  Apparently, she was (and still is) quite fond of chasing cats... hmmm... perhaps that's how she became a stray.  Nonetheless, we have managed to work out a system by investing in even more baby gates and tough it out because Baily deserves a stable and loving home too, all animals do, and so the cats must suck it up because they have also been in Bailey's paw prints themselves.  All of our animals have been rescued in one form or another - each with their own unique story to tell but I will save that for another blog entry.  As for this entry - I am going to end it by thanking you for reading today.  Harley is recovering nicely, and is slated to have his stitches removed next Friday.  He is jumping on the bed, and the dresser, and the table and the... well, you get the picture... he's being a happily purring conecat.  

This is DaCanon blasting off!

Monday, May 30, 2011

Tomorrow's the day

I'm really nervous about Harley's surgery, he's 15 years old.  I keep flashing back to when I had to put my Siamese cat, Brandy, down.  That was over 15 years ago but I still do a hard cry over that.  As I was standing in the vet's exam room Saturday, and they took Harley in the "back" to do blood-work, the flashback really smacked me in the face.  I haven't been able to shake that since.  I know Harley's surgery is minor, compared to others but the thought of somebody inducing unconsciousness to my little guy is getting to me.  

He's been with me since I rescued him at 3 weeks old.  I fed him with an eye dropper - he used to sleep inside my shoe (he likes danger).  We have moved across state lines six times together, traveled over 23,000 miles together, I've held him in my arms endless times, and he has lifted me out of the dumps all the same. I've protected him his whole life and the thought of me not being in there with him during this surgery is also driving me nuts - on the other hand, I couldn't stand the sight of him laying their helpless on a table, "chemically asleep".

I have to keep telling myself that he NEEDS this surgery to keep him comfortable and HAPPY!


 


This is DaCanon blasting off!

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Holiday gain before your pain. Part One

Last night, my oldest kitty, Harley D. came down stairs.  That alone is rare, since I also have 3 large dogs, and one of those dogs, Bailey, is so new to the pack that she has not figured out that cats are our "friends".  Harley won't go near the stairs suspecting Bailey in the house.  I didn't notice Harley right away - as a matter of fact, I wouldn't have noticed him on the stairs at all if he hadn't cried out to me.  Which brings me to the other rare thing... Harley is a whispering cat.  When he meows, he rarely makes a sound, his mouth moves as if he is meowing loudly but no sound.  There is nothing wrong with him, meaning, he's not mute, he's just cute.
I was sitting at my computer downstairs and I heard a faint kitten-like cry.  It was so faint that I thought perhaps a neighbor kitten was sitting on the window ledge of my porch, outside.  I looked out the window, saw no kitten and started to walk back to my computer when I heard it again, but this time, it wasn't a faint kitten meow, it was loud and nerving.  I looked in the direction of where it came from, and Harley was making his way down the stairs toward me and when our eyes met, he let out a cry so saddening that my heart melted. 

Now on the stairs with Harley, he seemed fine, he seemed lovable, he seemed to be overjoyed that I was stroking his fur.  I always know when Harley is so overcome with joy, he slobbers a bit.  When most cats are overcome with intense happiness they forget to swallow... "can't fool the droll!", I always say.  Well, he was there, on the stairs with me, rubbing his head on my hands, loving every second of it (and drooling like mad) and then I felt it.  A swelling of his ear so big that it startled me.  He wouldn't let me look at first, I imagine it to be quite sensitive.  Finally, after some coaxing, he allowed me to examine his ears.  He has a massive hematoma on his ear flap.  I tried to determine how much pain he might be in and see what I could do to help alleviate his discomfort. 

I don't like messing with animals ears so much.  I am a practical and resourceful person but I do know my limits.  Animals ears have so much sensitivity to them, so many nerves that could be damaged,  and... well... frankly speaking, I am not a vet so I do not want to chance Harley's ears just to save a few bucks.  I called the vet's office - naturally they were closing in 10 minutes.  They told me I could bring him in tomorrow morning (that would be today).

Today, upon arriving at the vet's office, I told them I wanted to put Harley on my Wellness Plan.  After I jumped through the usual hoops filling out paperwork, (not for the wellness plan, btw) and waiting forever for the vet to come in the exam room, the vet finally made his grand appearance. (Can you smell the disdain yet??  You will in a moment.)

This is a new vet, meaning, I had never seen him before.  I have been bringing my pack to this particular office for three years and not once had I seen this bumpkin.  I first told him I am putting Harley on my plan and he said,
"Whoa!!  Who told you you could do that?"
 "The girl I called last night as well as the girl at your front counter this morning", I replied.

That bumpkin then proceeded to lecture ME on administrative procedures.  The whole time this hillbilly slim-jim is flapping his gums, I'm thinking to myself, I don't work for you, ya jackass.  I finally stopped him and told him that I don't care what the procedures are, I don't do your paperwork - "I am a CLIENT!!!"  He quickly stopped his lecture and saw the error in his ways... preaching to the choir is pointless.

Keep in mind that I did not express my full "anger" with this vet, (yet).  I knew that  Harley needed treatment and it would, more than likely, be surgery.  I didn't want to put Harley in a helpless position and be at the mercy of Dr. Huckleberry Knobjockey because I chose to spout off at the vet and tell him what I think of his bedside manner.

They say that first impressions are the most important.  At this point, my first impression of this vet is already in an undertow and things only went further south from there.  After the lecture was finished, he looked at every inch of the cat, except his injured ear.  WTF?!?  I was growing impatient with this guy but bit my tongue.  The vet tech could tell I was "questioning" this vet's abilities.  Perhaps it was when I told the tech, "that's fucked up" right after the vet left the room, that he clued into my dissatisfaction, I dunno, just guessing.

Anyway, the vet came back in, then said Harley needed surgery on his ear and since he's going on a wellness plan, you might as well get his teeth cleaned and bla, bla, bla.  I understand the logic of the teeth cleaning, most animals have to be put under anesthesia for a thorough cleaning, and since Harley was going under for his ear anyway, might as well get it all done.  Its the way the vet said it that yanked my chain just a bit too hard.  He gave me the impression (#2) that he is all about the money.  He was "up-selling" my cat's prognosis in dollars and cents - almost like pointing out the upgrades of a car purchase.
I already knew what I wanted so I stopped his spiel and asked for the "basic plus" plan - all my dogs are on the "dog version" of that package. 

I was there to treat Harley's ear, to take care of the immediate pain he was enduring, to get him treated.  That's when things go really interesting.

I was ready for Harley to have surgery, for him to be fixed up, brought back to an acceptable comfort level.   The vet however didn't see it that way.  What he saw was that he was "tired today", "golfing on Sunday, and Monday is a holiday".  Then he said he doesn't like to do these surgeries until the hematoma is at least 4-5 days old.  THAT IS PREPOSTEROUS!!  He said all of this as he was walking out the exam room.  I wanted to say, "How dare you try to justify your holiday time by hiding it in vet-talk BS - I'm not a fool!" 
Instead, I said, "What about Monday?" wanting clarification.  The vet tech had to answer me because the door had already closed with the vet no longer in sight.
The tech told me that Monday is Memorial Day and the vet will be in only until 2:00pm.  I asked him if the they are closing early and he said, "No, but the doctor is going to a BBQ that day because its a holiday".  I was livid and that poor tech knew it right off the bat.  It was now my turn to lecture. 

I explained to the vet tech that I realize he is not to blame but I had something to say and he was going to listen. And so I gave him the "how dare this vet put his personal agenda above the sufferings of animals" speech. 

It was then that I remembered Harley STILL needed the surgery, so I apologized for my outburst toward him.  The tech said he understood, and that a lot of other people were complaining about this particular vet too - interesting!


The tech felt bad because he could see Harley was uncomfortable, so I asked him if anybody can be bumped on Monday to get Harley's surgery.  He checked but no deal.  I took a Tuesday appointment instead.

I hate like hell that Harley has to live with this until then but I felt my hands were tired.  Going to another vet was not an option in my area, I am sure I would have gotten the same "holiday" routine anyway. 

Yeah know, its funny (strange) that if Harley were a human child, the doctor would have treated it right on the spot.  What makes animals any less in pain over the same injury - is it that the cat isn't milking every ounce of sympathy from the parents, vying for guilt-points? 

My animals are my kids and I am the voice of my kids - even the whispering ones.

 I'll keep y'all updated on Harley's condition, thanks for reading.   

This is DaCanon blasting off!!